HH & Her Beans

Something has been trending around recently: self love. This is the idea that you're body is "perfect" and you are "perfect just the way you are." And if you are not happy with yourself, then people shun you for criticizing yourself. WHOA. When did this happen? Apparently if we are unsatisfied with how we look then we are aiming to be stick skinny. Apparently if we are not always "positive" then that's not okay. This is not "self love."

I believe in the concept of "self acceptance" it is working until you are satisfied with yourself. If you are chubby and you want to get down to a healthier weight. THEN THAT'S FINE!! You do not have to stick with the body that YOU ARE NOT SATISFIED WITH!! You are not happy with your body then no one else should be able to tell you other wise.

I am still working on the whole self acceptance thing... First is accepting my intelligence. How I won't be able to get the same grade as others and how I won't be able to get some scholarships because people who are more skilled than me received it instead. I do get jealous like any normal human being of other teenagers who are a whole lot younger and more successful than I will ever be. For example, one of my classmates developed these special hearing aids and right now all of the Ivy League schools wants to accept me. I realize that I am not EVEN close to doing something that amazing. Another girl developed an alarm for girls who are sexually abused. UHHH... I'm sorry that I didn't save the world today.

Second is the acceptance of my body. I'm working on that still... Trying to lose weight down to the point where I am healthy and happy. Lastly I'm trying to accept myself as a whole. I am passionate about art. I have a passion about writing. I LOVE wearing sweatpants and T-shirts and not look like a model when I'm wearing them. I adore exploring new places with my friends. I get anxiety when I am put in a social situation with people I don't know. My life is honestly not the best right now and I am definitely not the smartest and people need to be truthful about that. It just so happens that whenever I tell someone, "I really hate AP English." They will either say, "But you are soooooooo smart!!" or "I think your grades are good!!" It's okay to tell me, "Hey maybe you can work on improving yourself." That's not mean at all... that's the truth. Screw those people who are giving you bad feedback about "just believe in yourself." That's not going to get you anywhere, continue to improve yourself until you can reach self acceptance. Wherever that point is, it takes time and yea that truly sucks. Until next time, stay cool ma beans!!

I LOVE AMBER. AMBER IS LIFE!! I've never listened to a song by f(x) and the only reason why I listened to this comeback was because Amber was in it. I loved the song even more because of the man who choreographed their dance routine. My friend actually made me follow his Instagram when I first got my personal account. He is inspiring and just overall an amazing person. You can count on him for amazing choreography. Let's move on to the MV now... THE CONCEPT IS SO TUMBLRY I LOVE IT!!

f(x) in the woods...

EXO in the woods...

The time ellapse in the beginning is amazing. That's literally photography goals. Unlike normal MVs this MV was shot in a square frame which gives the perspective that you are filming the MV.

I diagnosed myself with shoppings disease. Symptoms include: excessively shopping, the urge to add many things to cart, wanting to buy anything you see, and hosting yard sales to get rid of old clothes.

I'm talking about this kinda shirt...

I don't know when this disease got a hold of me, but let me tell you how I got infected. One of my friends was actually infected first, she started changing her wardrobe into a more black and white vibe + Tumblr + Pinterest vibe. To me that's what many of us wear everyday, like black shirts, shorts, and flip flops but she used to be the super feminine type. All she wore was those Korea manufactured clothing consisting of lace, dirty pinks, and poka dots, so when she changed her style, it totally caught me off guard. And since shes's so skinny and tall, I thought that what she was wearing was totally my style.

This is basically her...

I didn't change my clothing, but I started buying things that are a lot more mature (in my opinion). Before I used to wear bright colors like neons, hot pinks, sapphire blues, oranges, and greens, but nowwwwww my closet consists of greys, blacks, jean type fannels, and whites. Ever since then, I had the urge to buy something every single time that I go out and almost every week, I have the urge to go online shopping and add stuff to my Amazon cart. You would think that this disease only affect clothes shopping, this weekend I bought: 24 pack pens, 1 sticker sheet of tattoos, 1 white shirt from Target, 1 new student planner, 1 shirt, sandals, crew neck from Hollister. I AM SHOPPING TO MUCH!! Last week I bought 4 cell phone cases, and 4 pencil pouches ALL AT ONCE!! To make up for the money that I spent (also I want to clean my room) I am going to be hosting a yard sale the same weekend where I'm getting my ears pierced. My desk is over flowing with pens, pencils, and papers, maybe I can sell all of that. I suggest all you beans should host your own yard sales, I might go... Until next time, stay cool ma beans.