HH & Her Beans

When I was a little bean, I wanted to dress myself instead of wearing what my mom picked for me.

Then when I grew a little older, I wanted to go out with a group of friends to watch movies and take hard courses that gives me more credibility. Finally now, at the end of Sophomore year, I want to go to my dream college, get a part time job and decorate my dorm room however I want. Whenever, I tell my friends that I want to be in college, I realize that I will probably regret it. You see, I know this girl who took many APs during high school during second grade, and she would talk about it when she is in art class, and I seriously wanted to be like her. BUT LOOK AT ME NOW!! I am taking AP classes and I want to die.

Watch me when I get into college start being like, "I wish I was in high school." I think this artificial want to be grown up is a way for us to want to fit in with society, and the expectations from social media. Okay take this for example, High School Musical, 3 movies by Disney based on the lives of 6 students and they sing... Every day of their lives. NO. That's so not how high school really is. I came to high school expecting to jump on desks and sing, but instead I got homework until 12. I want to date guys, seriously... I think everyone wants to be dating right now even if you don't say it, you know it's true. You want to date not so that you have someone to support you, but you like the idea of "dating." Just like dating, growth/maturity is a artificial need, you don't really need to grow up as fast. Growing up means responsibility, suffering, failure and management. This year, I learned how to accept failure. I got a C in my AP Bio class, it is actually my first AP class. From this grade, I learned that it is okay to be not good at some subjects and excel in others but that's not going to stop me from trying to improve on my knowledge in this subject. Growing up means responsibility, we have to be responsible for the things that we do and the actions that we carry out, it's no longer just aimless learning, we have a direction. Growing up = time increase, you might suffer when you see your loved ones pass, or suffer through a difficult time in your life. So I want to ask you, do you still want to grow up? Until next time, stay cool ma beans, and live in the moment. 

Okay, in a way I asked him... But in a way it's super gross.... So leggo...
This all started during promo. I knew this guy and we were "besties" like we were pretty close friends. Before I go on, I need to tell you where he is now. In seventh grade, he was a fob that no one liked and so when he started speaking English, he made more friends but he was not even close to being popular. Being the fob that he is, his family is very rich, so when high school rolled around, he started wearing nice ironed shirts and those private school pants. He's now a extreme wannabe since he is in my school's choir. With dis back ground knowledge, let's actually get to the flashback. I knew that he liked this girl called G and they were closer than we were so this guy goes: "I want to ask her to promo but Idk how to ask her." SO being the retard and lazy cheese ball I am, I just texted back: "I really like you. Would you go to promo with me?" This selfish piece of crap was like: "Wow I did not expect this. But okay, let's go together!" I was just like... WTF.

A girl with chestnut hair, and a barely shaven guy stood strolled closely together while they get from one class to the next. She is always on her phone, while the guy is always listening to music. I can see them everyday. Not once, did they acknowledge each other's presence, and not once did they consider how closely they were walking together. Almost brushing shoulders.Since I'm an observer, at first glance one would assume that they are dating, but then realizing that they are merely strangers who did not notice each other. Seeing this,I slowly started to wonder... Check out the rest of this dilemma on my website: ahamilton1018.wix.com/wtfidk.